Those two idiots
by snow642
Summary: Years has passed since Weirdmageddon, things has been peaceful until suddenly rifts begin opening up all over the world. The Nightmare Realm is spilling in and the Pines family's only hope to stop it is the crazy triangle that rule the Nightmare Realm, the same one they erased from Stanley's mind. But even if they managed to summon him it not like he will help them...right?
1. Chapter 1

The Pines family's enjoyed years of peace before the first sight of trouble appeared. No one noticed the first tear for a couple of hours as it had appeared in the sky over the Pacific Ocean. It is still a mystery to everyone but the residences of Gravity Falls, the tear is all too familiar to them and they had turned to the Pines family to fix it.

Mabel and Dipper are now adults and the both of them had decided to join their Grunkles at sea. They had to build a bigger boat so they can all fit and named it Pines O' War, which is actually a good thing as the Stan O' War II was badly beaten and Stanley was too stubborn to have it replaced.

They had split in two teams, Stanley and Dipper in one team and Stanford and Mabel in the other. Both teams tried different ways to close the rifts but they only managed to close it for an hour at most before it opened up again. They were running out of time, there are rifts all over the world and nothing they do is stopping them.

After failing to find another way to seal the rifts they met up again in Gravity Falls.

"What are we going to do, Grunkle Ford?" Dipper asked as he paced around the room. "Nothing is working!" He yelled as he pull on his hat in frustration.

"Calm down, Dipper. We'll find a way, there has to be a way." Mabel gently place his hand on Dipper's arm.

"There...there is one method we haven't tried..." Stanford look away as he hold up a picture of Bill Cipher.

"What!? Are you out of your mind, Ford?" Stanley slam his hands on the table as he glare at Stanford.

"This is the only way!" Stanford pinch the bridge of his nose. "Maybe if we had more time to find a way to close the rifts we won't have to resort to this but we're running out of time! Please, you know I won't have suggested this if it isn't our last hope."

"But didn't we erased Bill from Grunkle Stan's mind?" Dipper frowned, not liking the idea but know that Stanford is speaking the truth, they are running out of time.

"Bill is a being of pure energy, it is impossible to kill him permanently. He'll find a way to come back on his own but if we play our cards right and use the right spells we will be able to bind Bill to me." Ford said as he starts taking out spell books.

"Whoa whoa whoa! Hold on there Poindexter, bind him to you? Are you crazy?"

"This is the only way, Lee! With Bill bind to me I will have control over him, he will not be able to use his powers without my permission and he will be tied to me."

"If it's possible you can add this spell." Dipper open one of the spell books to show a spell that forces the person who the spell is used on to obey the caster.

"I've thought of that but I'm not sure if it will work on Bill." Ford run his hand through his hair. "Of course it would be good if it does..."

"We can make it work!" Mabel smiled brightly. "We're the Pines family! If we can beat Bill we can do anything!"

"Mabel's right, we just have to figure everything out." Dipper smiled as he puts the book down. "It won't be easy but we can do it."

Stanley sigh softly. "Can't argue with that." He smiled slightly. "Well we're going to need lots of coffee if we want this done before the world ends." He said as he walk out to make the coffee.


	2. Chapter 2

The Pines family spent weeks working on the spell and they are finally ready. The preparation is all set and ready for the last step.

Stanley places a hand on Stanford's shoulder. "It isn't too late to back down, none of us will think less of you."

Stanford gives his twin a forced smile as he places his hand over Stanley's hand. "We've already gotten this far, we have to see it through." He squeezes his brother's hand gently. "I'll be fine, Lee. The spell will hold." He gives his brother a hug before turning to walk towards the statue of Bill that is in the middle of a magic circle and chained down with chains forged with unicorn hair, moonstone and mercury in them. The same three ingredients are placed around Bill's statue in case the chains doesn't work.

Stanford cleared his throat and held up his hand. "I summon the all seeing eye. Master of Chaos, Dreams and Knowledge. I give this vessel for your use so give me power, fame and youth."

Stanford repeat the chant three times before the statue's eye starts glowing and it slowly spread to the rest of the statue. Once the glowing stopped, Bill lowered his hand and float off the ground as he stares at the Pines family with an unnerving calmness that it almost made Stanford forgot the finished the last part of the spell. It scared him more than he would like to admit when Bill didn't speak or move as blue chains attached itself around where his neck should be before disappearing.

Bill stare at Stanford without blinking or moving that the Pines family thought that they messed up the spell.

"Bill?" Stanford said hesitantly as he took a step forward.

"Yes, Master?" Bill asked in his echoing voice but it sounds empty, lifeless.

"Okay, what are you playing at?" Stanley moves to push his brother behind him and shake his fist at Bill.

"No games, Sir." He said with the same lifeless echo voice.

Mabel moves forward, ducking under Stanley's arm and slowly walk towards Bill's side. "Are you alright, Bill?" She pokes one of Bill's corner.

Bill moves slightly to the side before moving back to the same position, his eye never leaving Stanford. "I am fine, Madam."

"Okay. Grunkle Ford, what's wrong with Bill?" Dipper asked nervously as he slowly moves to his sister's side.

"I don't know, Dipper." Stanford moves closer with Stanley to stand in front Bill Cipher, making sure everyone stay outside of the forcefield. "Why are you acting like this, Bill?"

"How else should I act after being forcefully bounded to another person?" He let a soft growl into his voice.

"Oh, that's rich coming from you!" Dipper glared at Bill.

Bill narrow his eye. "I've lied, mislead and tricked people but never what you have done to me. And you people call me the bad guy, I would have helped you close the rifts if you had asked nicely."

The Pines family all tense up. "How..."Mabel whispered as she steps away from Bill.

"I am the ALL seeing eye, Shooting Star." His eye never leaving Stanford. "Your dimension is always destined to open up a rift to the Nightmare Realm and your dimension is destined to be destroyed whether it is by your hands or by creatures from the Nightmare Realm." He smiled with his eye. "It is a destiny set by Time Giants and enforced by Time Baby, lucky for you. I hate the Time Baby and I am willing to help you stop it from happening IF you release me from the binding."

"Like hell we'll release you!" Stanford glare at Bill. "We won't fall for any of your tricks!"

Bill chuckle loudly. "You think I'm lying? Well then go ahead, don't believe me. If you force me to close them they won't stay close. You need me on your side or destiny to repeat itself over and over again." He smiled as he holds his hands behind his back. "I can wait for you to see what is obviously in front of you. After all, I am not the one running out of time."


	3. Chapter 3

Summoning Bill Cipher and binding the demon to oneself is tiring but Stanford Filbrick Pines refuse to rest longer than his body needs. There is still lots of things to do and he smells breakfast, hopefully Dipper is the one cooking, Stanley would often get hair into the food and Mabel still loves putting glitter into foods she cooks.

He took a quick shower and put on a new set of clothes before heading down to the kitchen. He frowned when he saw his family standing outside the kitchen. "What's going on..." He trail off when he saw what they are staring at.

Bill Cipher is floating around the kitchen cooking breakfast, wearing Stanley's 'Kiss the chef' apron and the chef hat Mabel had gotten him to match the apron.

"Bill...what are you doing?" Stanford narrow his eyes as he cross his arms.

"Well good morning to you too, Master! I thought it was obvious that I'm making breakfast?" He glance towards Stanford while flipping the pancake. "I'm also done with the last batch of pancakes so why don't you take a seat and start eating?" He pointed toward the table which is filled with food.

"What I mean is why are you making breakfast? What are you planning, Cipher?" Stanford growled as he stomped toward Bill.

"Your order for me is to and I quote 'Take care of my family and protect them from harm' end quote." Bill placed the last batch of pancakes on the table. "And seeing as you did not give me permission to use my powers I have to protect and take care of them the old fashion way, starting with breakfast." He starts washing the cooking utensils he was using. "They aren't poisoned if that's what you are worried about, they are safe for you humans to eat."

Mabel walk towards the food and took a bite out of the pancakes before anyone can stop her. Her eyes light up as she turn toward Bill. "This is the best pancake I've ever had! Soft, fluffy and just the right amount of sweetness! Teach meeeeeeeeeeeeee!" She clasps her hands together as she gives him the puppy dog eyes.

Bill chuckle softly. "Tomorrow, for now eat up before it gets cold."

Mabel cheered and sat down to eat the food Bill prepared.

"Slow down, Shooting Star. The food isn't going anywhere." Bill said calmly as he dry his hands.

"If you think you can get us to let our guards down..." Stanford glare at Bill as they all sat down to eat.

"Trust me when I say this Master, the only thing I am planning is to sit back and watch as you realise what I said is true and you'll have no choice but to release me." Bill smiled as he float next to Stanford.

"I would never release you!"

"We'll see, Master. We'll see."


	4. Chapter 4

Bill whistled as he look up at the sky. "Wow! You sure waited a long time before summoning me! I think I might be able to see my house from here!" He chuckled at his own joke.

"Enough!" Stanford glare at the demon. "Seal the rift." He ordered.

"Yes Master." Bill narrow his eye as he use his power to force both ends of the rift together. Just as both ends touch a blast of energy hit Bill and throw him onto the ground, leaving a nice Bill shape hole which he is now climbing out of.

"What was that!?" Stanford turned towards Bill who is struggling to pull both ends of the rift together again.

"The rift refused to be closed, Master." Bill hissed out as he use all his power to quickly pull both ends together and seal it. "It is fighting me to stay open-" He was cut off before he can say anymore another blast of energy hit him as the rift force itself open and this time it knocked him out.

"Bill? Get up!" Stanford ordered but the triangle stayed on the ground. "Bill?" He slowly walk towards him. "Bill, I order you to get up!" He stop next to the demon and waited for him to open his eye but it didn't happen.

Bill hasn't full recover when he was summoned by Stanford and he had used the last of his energy to try sealing the rift. He will be out for quite awhile and even longer for him to be strong enough to try sealing the rift, and fail, again.

"Wow he is really out." Mabel poke Bill's side a few times before turning face her family.

"What are we going to do now, Grunkle Ford? If Bill can't even seal the rift..." Dipper bite his lip, what would happen to them left unsaid.

"If we release him like he said he'll be able to seal it?" Mabel suggested. "It can't be as bad as what is about to happen..."

"No way!" Stanley cross his arms. "We don't know what's going through his head, he might make things worse for all we know!"

"Dipper." Ford turn towards the youngest in the room. "Do you remember the Project Mentem?"

"Well yeah. It can scan the mind and encrypt it Bill can't read them." Dipper gives Ford a confused look.

"I created a new one that should be able to read Bill's mind, with it we can see just what he is planning before we decide on what we should do." Ford glance towards Bill. "And with him knocked out it would make things easier for us."

"Lets do it." Stanley pick Bill up by his leg and hold him as far away as possible. "I hate to admit it but Bill is right, we are running out of time."

"Okay...are you all ready?" Stanford asked as he step away from Bill, who is now hooked up to the machine.

"Ready as we'll ever be, Ford. Let's do this." Stanley gives his brother the thumbs-up.

"Here goes nothing." Stanford start up the machine as they all turn to look at the screen.

As time went by Bill started noticing something that disturbs him, he was falling in love with the cute intelligent human he is using and it is unacceptable! He tried to ignore his feelings but it refuse to go away! It is interfering with his plan and he doesn't like it, he even felt bad for hurting his meatsack by accident! He has to end this partnership even if it means waiting a little longer!

Okay. Breaking off their friendship the way he did may not have been his best idea. Sixer is now a mess and thanks to that he is also a mess, always worrying that he'll accidentally kill him while working, always wanting to take over just so he can force food down his throat, take a shower and/or get some much needed sleep. He didn't know just how badly Sixer would have taken it, that it would course him to end up like the mess he is now.

Which is another problem, he never care who's mind he messed, who's life he ruins, but for some reason Sixer is different. Watching Sixer fall into depression and paranoid over everything, seeing him as a shadow of who he was, hurts. He hates to admit it but it hurts. And it hurts even more not knowing how to fix him. Sixer refuse to even let him close and he jumps at everything, even his own shadow.

Guess which idiot decided to come into his Dimension. That IDIOT should have taken the portal APART after he broke off their partnership! His Dimension is too dangerous for a human, he has to get him back but none of his friends managed to catch him! At least he managed to find a way out. Which is a good and bad thing. Good because he doesn't have to worry that he'll be killed in his Dimension, bad because now he is worried he'll be killed in some other dimensions.

Good thing he has favours in different dimensions that he can cash in, all the damn things he'll do for that idiot, he better not die or he'll bring him back and ripe him apart for wasting his time.

Placing a metal plate in his head? Building a quantum destabilise? Seriously just how much does Sixer hate him? He's not even bothering him in his dreams anymore! And he hasn't since their partnership was broken off! He could have waited until he died to try escaping again so he didn't have to worry about him but noooooooooooooooo he just has to try taking a shot at him!

Worst of all his friends isn't helping! 'Bill, just tell him that you like him.' 'Stop being stubborn and talk it out with that human, Bill.' 'Stop complaining Bill, you won't have to worry so much if you had confessed to him while you're still friends.' Like he didn't know he had messed up.

But the portal is opened and Sixer is back in his dimension so he doesn't have to worry about him again. Right?

He had spoken too soon. The portal created an interdimensional rift, his dimension might be the first to spill into Sixer's but it won't be the last. He has to get rid of it or all his hard work keeping Sixer alive will be for nothing. But Sixer is still as stubborn as ever and won't hand it to him so he'll have to find another way.

Tricking one of Time Baby's men was so hilariously easy! Fooling Shooting Star into handing over the interdimensional rift was even easier. Now to get his friends out of his decaying dimension first before he closes the rift.

This party never stops. Time is dead and meaning has no meaning. Existence is upside-down and I reign supreme. WELCOME, ONE AND ALL, TO WEIRDMAGEDDON!

Okay, he has to admit that he may have went a little overboard when he finally got his physical form and seal Time Baby in an Antarctic glacier, that last part isn't his fault. That oversized bobblehead needed a time out.

Anyway, back on track. Time to seal up that rift once and for all!

You know what really pissed Bill Cipher off? The ONE time he decided to save a dimension instead of destroying it he is stopped by a barrier. And the only person with his ticket out of Gravity Falls refused to tell him how to destroy the barrier! He can't seal the rift from inside the barrier but he can't tell Sixer because he'll think it's a trick! Damn it all! If he refuse to tell him then he'll just have to find a way to make him talk!

It is so cute that they think using his zodiac to vanquish him would save them. If the rift is not closed he can always use it as a door to come back but now he has the one thing Sixer cares about in the whole world, his family! He might hurt Shooting Star a little for hurting his eye but he isn't going to kill her...on purpose. Her accidental death would not be his fault.

Humans are so cute, they think they can trick Bill Cipher by switching clothes. Of course he saw through it, he is the all seeing eye. But! Letting them erase him would close the rift because his powers will automatically stuck his energy back into the Nightmare Realm and seal the rift behind it so he let's the human think that he is tricked and erased. They will come crying to him for help in a few years anyway, this isn't a permanent solution. All he has to do is wait.

They all stare at the screen in shock, they were not expecting this and Mabel was the first one to snap out of shock. "It's so cute!" She squeal in delight. "It is like the most romantic love story ever! An evil demon is willing to give it all up for his human crush! Watching from the side to make sure that his love is safe, torn between love and his evil goal~"

"I don't think this is the right time for you to get all romance crazy, Mabel." Dipper look at the shock man who still hasn't moved.

"Well congratulations, only you will manage to make a demon fall for you." Stanley gently pat his brother's back, he really can't help but pity him.

Before Stanford can say a word the screen light up to show three humans on screen.

"Hey are you two done yet?" a female teenage asked as she look around a city that has fallen into ruins with her makeshift weapon up and ready.

"...Yeah, we're done." The only male among the three of them said as he walk towards the older female and a young girl in tow as he tries to zip an overflowing bag.

"Hey stop that!" The oldest grab the bag from him. "You're going to break the bag, I've told you to take your time to pack it." She said as she repack the bag.

The oldest female is now fighting off black disfigured monsters while the other two is nowhere in sight. The Pines family watch as she kill them without hesitation, only for them to be immediately replaced with another monster. She is starting to tired down and just as she is about to be tackled from behind; the monster was shot right through the head and a well protected man run towards her.

"You alright?" He asked as he helps her kill off the monsters.

"I'll be feeling much better once they are all dead." She said tiredly as she force her body to continue fighting.

The first three humans the Pines family saw are now cramped into a room of people who are all trying their best to sleep.

"That's it." The oldest growled as she stood up. "I promise we won't continue living like this." She left the room they are in and head straight towards the building with guards standing outside. She stopped in front with her arms crossed. "I wish to speak with Harrison."

"Yeah and I wish for everything to go back to normal but we don't always get what we want, now run along and play with you doll or what you kids play with now." One of the guards said as he shoo her away.

The teenager grind her teeth as she glare up at the big man. "I am not leaving until I see Harrison!"

"Look kid-" The guard is cut off by the door opening and Harrison step out with two other men.

"Regina? What are you doing here?" Harrison look down at the angry teenage.

The teenage, now named Regina, took a deep breath to calm herself. "I heard that fighter's family have their own room and have better food."

Harrison nod his head. "That is correct."

"I would like to join."

"Are you sure, Regina?" He asked as he looks down at the short teenager. "I don't think I need to tell you just how dangerous it can be."

Regina smirked as she crosses her arms. "Oh please, I was out there for almost a full year fighting off those monsters with nothing but a knife tied to a pipe. I can handle this."

"Alright, but don't come crying to me when it gets too hard for you."

"I'm back!" Regina grinned as she entered the room.

"姐!" The teenage male and little girl run up to their older sister and hug her. "We got something for you!"

"Oh? What is it?" Regina asked curiously. Her siblings took out a bowtie and top hat that looks a lot like the ones Bill is always wearing.

"You had always wanted a suit so we're learning to make one!" Little girl smiled.

"Besides you have to look good while you're showing those monsters who's boss!" The teenage male grinned.

"Harrison! What is the meaning of this?" Regina yelled as she forced herself into the room that the leaders of their camp are discussing their next plan.

"Regina? How did you get in here?" Harrison asked in shock.

"I asked what is the meaning of this!?" She yelled as she slammed him against the wall. "Why are my siblings dead?"

Harrison holds up his hand to stop anyone from interfering. "I'm really sorry for your lost, Regina. But their deaths is just an unfortunate event, you know we are running low on food and your siblings aren't the only ones who died because of it."

"HOW DARE YOU!?" She yelled as she attacked the man, ignoring the other leaders ordering her to stand down, and shoved the Harrison into the next room and closed the door behind them. She didn't listen to anyone as she throws the man and hurt him however she can, not caring that the room turned bright red, not from blood but because of the light, when Harrison was thrown against a button. She just continues hitting him until he is nothing more than a bloody mess.

Regina is sitting curled in the corner of the room, staring into space, with the bloody mess that was once Harrison not far from her.

When the red light change to green and the door unlock it immediately caught Regina's attention. She shot up and run out of the door, not noticing the bones that she passed.

"What's going on?" She whispered as she look around, instead of humans there are only bones everywhere. She goes back into the building she came out from and dig through the files and paled at what she saw. "No...it can't be..." She whispered.

Before they can watch more Bill woke up and rip the machine off of him. "What do you think you're doing?" He hissed as he turn red I his anger.


End file.
